Redundancy rarely comes completely out of the blue. But it can nevertheless come as a surprise. Businesses will typically intimate that they need to cut costs. And a few weeks later, the meetings may start.

Your boss, having been involved in selecting you for redundancy, should have the guts and decency to deliver the message him or herself. There’s little worse than a manager who ducks this and passes the burden on to an HR officer who has never met you before the day of the gardening-leave goodbye.

Assuming your boss attends, you’re likely to find it a bit surreal sitting in a room with him or her, following an agreed script, with an HR professional by their side. Your boss (who might also be an old friend) should have been through some training or coaching in delivering the message. If they have, you are not likely to hear the word 'sorry', although in the absence of any training, 'sorry' may well be said. So too may things like, “This hurts me as much as it does you,” or, “I know just how you feel,” which can sound very insincere even when kindly meant.

Following this meeting, your firm will be likely to follow a pre-agreed plan. Unfortunately, the whole process of making a person redundant has become, rightly or wrongly, more of a risk management exercise. Your IT access could therefore be immediately stopped and, depending on your role, you may even be asked not to return to your desk.

Subsequently, you may enter a ‘consultation period’, during which you are put on ‘gardening leave’ whilst alternative job options are explored. Be proactive about this – the reality is that you may have a proposition to offer that no one has thought through. Don’t expect HR to do all the legwork – they are likely to be fully stretched as it is.

If no suitable alternative role is found by the end of the consultation period, you may have the good luck to be introduced to an outplacement firm that is able to provide effective personal support and commercial advice to help you on the way to your next career move or life’s desire.

Throughout the process, remain upbeat. It is for you ‘to boldly go’ through your network and into the wider world, initiating conversations and beaming with optimism and generosity of spirit. Others will be relieved to see you being so positive – it will not only make your old colleagues feel less guilty at having survived, but you will also find that your enthusiasm for a new job is infectious and your supporters' club grows and becomes more proactive in helping you.

Sitting the storm out without a smile will not bring out the sun.

Philip Beddows is a partner at business and career mentoring firm IDDAS. You can contact him on beddowsp@iddas.com.